5 Steps to Improve Your Relationship With Your Wife | HuffPost Life
Your marriage is the most important relationship you'll ever have. Learn to improve it Consciously give your spouse your “best”. Let's face it. Your relationship with your husband or wife might start to take a toll if both A simple activity such as packing a picnic or taking walk down the beach is good enough. Simple acts such as setting the coffee machine to brew, making lunch or. Examples of Negative Relationship of Husband & Wife Never make your husband feel that he is not doing good enough for the family or that you are not.
The key word is action. If you don't do anything, nothing will change. I chose action -- to do something for my wife. To always think how I can make it easier for her. To serve is always better than to receive. Here are the five tips that helped me.
Listen and ask questions The clues are there if you just listen. You may think it's a riddle, but just focus on what they are trying to convey. The answers will be there. If you don't understand, ask questions, try to continue the conversation. Most of the time, we are hearing, but not understanding, what our spouse is talking about.
You're not engaging in the conversation; you're just looking to get it over with. Try not to move on to what you want to talk about. Try to understand your partner's point of view by listening, questioning and finally, understanding.
Don't buy stuff, create memories Yes, most women love jewelry, but they also love taking pictures and creating memories. Instead of buying her love with a necklace or a ring, go on sites like Groupon and book an activity that both of you can enjoy together. My wife and I have enjoyed salsa lessons, cooking classes and even a trapeze workshop! It didn't matter what the event was; it was the fact that we were doing it together that made it special.
The accomplishment of doing something together will form a greater bond than any item you can buy. We sometimes forget that everything doesn't revolve around us.
Your wife may be upset about something and it has nothing to do with you. Your wife may be stressed from watching the kids, work, school, whatever.
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What should you do? If it's the kids, take them to the mall or the movies. If it's work, pour her a glass of wine and go for a jog. If it's school, buy her an hour massage to relax her. The most important thing is for her to clear her mind and relax.
Just give her space and she will appreciate the gesture. Think before you speak If we just waited that half second, we wouldn't have said it. We get too comfortable and lose sight of the other person's feelings. I can't tell you how many times I received the silent treatment because I said something insensitive.
I knew it was bad, but I didn't think before I spoke. There are things we all know that we can or can't say to our spouse. We try to walk this line, especially when we are upset. When you're about to say something, particularly in an argument, just take a deep breath. Ask yourself, "How will this benefit the situation? Think, speak and be merry. Take action This is the most important step. Do the dishes, take out the garbage and hang that picture. Do it before being asked.
So many arguments and issues can be resolved by just taking action. I've been going on girls' trips for as long as I've been married. Yes, I love traipsing off with my spouse and three kids. But these weekends away with friends are also important. Swapping stories with others and enjoying new experiences make me -- I hope -- a more interesting person for my spouse to be around.
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When Katie Couric asked Barbra Streisand the secret to her happy year marriage to James Brolin, she replied "time apart. Your marriage should be your primary relationship -- but it needn't be the only one. There are many things you should never say to a longtime spouse, the first being: It's also never a good idea to start a sentence with: We hopefully all have a pretty good sense of ourselves at this point and having someone you love point out a failing in this way does little to engender a loving relationship.
Neither of these is true. If you start a sentence with these words your mate is certain to shut down or start a fight.
Stop for a minute and think about what you really mean to say -- and then say that instead. Put away the jumper cables yourself. In life, there are big things and there are little things. The big things -- draining the bank accounts to support a gambling habit, forgetting to mention that he's in the federal witness relocation program living under a false identity or that he has a second family stashed in Queens -- are of course one-way streets to divorce court.
But most of us don't have problems of that magnitude. Most of us have problems that are more like petty and repeated annoyances, which when fed the steroids of resentment and anger, balloon up like Arnold Schwarzenegger. And we all know what steroids did to his heartright? Most of our problems start out small enough -- he borrows the jumper cables from your car and then leaves them sitting in the driveway just waiting to get run over -- and from that sprouts a giant festering sore.How to become a Good Husband - एक अच्छे पति कैसे बने - Qualities of a Good Husband - Monica Gupta
It leads you to utter words like, "If you loved me you would have put the jumper cables back in my car so that when I get stuck in a bad neighborhood with a dead battery I could save myself," which, in my household, generally results in a reply like "When do you ever drive in bad neighborhoods?
For a happier marriage, address them right away and keep it simple. Sometimes the best way to address a problem is to just walk away from it -- as in seriously let it go. Not every slight must be addressed.
Know that not every insult is intended. Practice letting go as much as you can. Bite your tongue until the tip bleeds.
5 Steps to Improve Your Relationship With Your Wife
And once in a while, remind yourself of why you married this person. Focus on those reasons and let stuff pass without mention. The trick to successful silence, however, is that you really let the problem pass.
If you stay silent and still harbor bad thoughts, well, that's where ulcers come from. As the Beatles told us, "Let It Be. Relationships aren't flat-lined; that's death, actually. Life has ups and downs, peaks and valleys. We all go through periods where the mere thought of life without our partners can bring tears to our eyes and then a week later we can't stand the sound of their breathing next to us.
We've all been there. The trick is knowing that you won't stay in either place forever. Truth is, in a marriage, you spend most of your time in an emotional middle ground.
It's not songbirds chirping, nor is it considering which poison in his pasta will cause the most painful demise. This middle ground isn't the couple who sit in the restaurant across from one another without conversing. Those people have actually flat-lined and just don't know it yet. No, the middle ground is when months meld into years and you know what the reaction will be before you say something.
It's when the book you finished last night just migrates automatically to the nightstand on his side and he tells you about the recorded "Modern Family" episode you slept through. It's the every day ebb and flow without the waves. We tend to take advantage of those we love the most -- probably because we know they love us and we can get away with it.
It's the old kick-the-cat syndrome. You have a bad day at the office and come home and take it out on your mate. A much healthier pattern is to start out each day by asking yourself, "What can I do today to make my partner happy?