How do mend my relationship

7 Ways to Save a Struggling Relationship | HuffPost Life

how do mend my relationship

Psychologist Dr Guy Winch, author of How To Fix A Broken Heart, has Looking back on a relationship in hindsight, it is easy for our minds to. The 4 Most Common Relationship Problems — And How To Fix Them Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage. Fix the emotion -- your anger – by deep breathing and calming yourself down, by walking away. Do your best to stay out of the weeds of content.

How to Mend A Broken Relationship - Forever Conscious

Why is this so rare? John cited a study showing couples with kids talk to each other about 35 minutes per week. You say something and you want them to respond. Couples with high scores build relationship equity. And that makes a big difference. Show admiration Ever listen to someone madly in love talk about their partner? They sound downright delusional.

how do mend my relationship

They act like the other person is a superhero. And research shows that is perfect. Masters see their partner as better than they really are.

Disasters see their partners as worse than they really are. For more on the science of sexy, click here. Admiration is about the story you tell yourself about your partner. What kind of story do you tell? When your partner describes your relationship to others, what kind of story do they tell?

Does the story minimize the negatives and celebrate the positives? Did it make the other person sound great?

how do mend my relationship

Quick are we to think, "He's no good, I'll dump him and find someone else. We are taught to be independent, and this is an incredible discipline; we are self-made and self-sustainable. But taken to the extreme, this attitude is guaranteed to interfere in our relationships. No one can be exchanged for anyone else.

  • How to Mend A Broken Relationship
  • The 4 Most Common Relationship Problems — And How To Fix Them

Your partner is not a pair of pants you picked up at Macy's. Your partner was placed in your life for a greater reason in divine timing.

He or she is a human being brimming with flaws and awful failings Beware of abandoning someone just because they require a bit of inner repair work. This is not to say that you should ever settle for an unhealthy situation, but a successful relationship entails honest work and the payoff can be extraordinarily rewarding in terms of not just finding, but keeping, long-term love.

If you believe you can sift through people until you find the perfect package, you will remain highly disappointed throughout your relationships. You may find someone different, perhaps a bit better, but who will still need "fixing. And each person we encounter will test our capacity for sacrifice, compromise, patience, and tolerance.

A real relationship that endures through time is one in which you have poured forth more love and understanding than you ever thought possible of you.

It's admirable to believe in the unique power of your relationship, and even wiser to realize that no, you won't magically stumble upon a fairytale romance. If you currently find yourself in a relationship that's weak, broken, or on the brink of collapse, but that you believe deserves your effort, don't give up. Consider these seven ways to save your struggling relationship: Re-evaluate the reasons you're together.

Go back to the beginning. What drew me to this person to begin with? What qualities did they possess that I found valuable?

7 Ways to Save a Struggling Relationship

What made them so amazing? And are they still? Reevaluating the reasons you came together reminds you of the reasons to stay together, and this strengthens your already-existing foundation. Ask your partner what they love and don't love about you; be open to constructive criticism and self-improvement. There is a right way and a wrong way to communicate. The right way is asking your partner a relevant question, listening to their response, then offering your opinion.

The wrong way is overwhelming your partner with your irritations and worries as soon as they walk in from a particularly long workday. If you feel wronged by your partner, does it come as any surprise? There are always clues, it is our responsibility to listen to them.

We are always in charge of how we feel. Practicing forgiveness is one of the most humbling experiences.

7 Ways To Fix A Broken Relationship

Nobody is perfect and everybody is on their own journey so can we really judge them? Forgiving is not saying that what happened was okay, rather, forgiving just means that you have made peace with the pain and you are ready to let it all go.

You will need to do this whether you get back together or stay apart so you might as well begin now. They reflect back to us things that we need to work on and it is always the best relationships, that is the ones that offer the most growth, that are often the most challenging. Oprah once gave this analogy which sums this all up perfectly- the Universe first gives you a whisper, then a tug, then a scream and then boom, the brick hits you in the face!

Do the work when you see it arise, no matter how challenging.

The 4 Most Common Relationship Problems -- And How To Fix Them - Barking Up The Wrong Tree

Doing the work really refers to going within and finding out how to transcend the issues of your relationship consciously. Sometimes, that does involve walking away, and other times it involves just looking in the mirror. MAKE PEACE If you do decide to walk down the path of reconciliation and both of you have done and are continuing the work, be gentle with each other and let go of any expectations.