The top five money issues couples argue about | Relate
Issues surrounding money are one of the most common conflicts within relationships, even where there is plenty of love. Here are five ways that. Previous studies have shown that financial concerns are among the most (31 percent) reported that money is a major source of conflict in their relationship. Money issues can cause no end of arguments in a relationship. Through my experience as a professional couple counsellor, I've found that.
As with all problems, communication is key! You do need to be able to communicate openly and honestly about your joint and individual financial wants and needs.
The top five money issues couples argue about
You can learn and become better at it over time. You don't need to resolve all of your problems in one conversation alone. Before you continue here, I recommend reading my article on how to argue linkto give yourself the best chance of having a more constructive conversation. How to approach your partner Write down precisely what the problem is from your point of view.
State it clearly as a fact in no more than a few sentences. Next, write down what you feel about the situation but no pointing the finger here. Own your role in the arguments!
For now, onto the next step As the old saying goes: Be brave, determined and energetic - and sort it yourself if your partner isn't ready to cooperate. And, importantly, you're likely to feel a great deal better for taking some simple but really positive action. How to effectively deal with money issues in your relationship Now for a little more help with brushing up your communication skills for when you're trying to deal with money issues in your relationship.
Do you like to pay everything on time, and save whenever you can? Or are you a risk taker, who prefers to live just for today?
You both need to know exactly which aspects of your finances are troubling you and why. Neither of you is a mind reader, and you can only begin to fix the problems when you know exactly what they are. Get the facts right As mentioned before, if your financial paperwork is in a mess, that needs sorting first. Guess work, melodrama or lies will only fuel arguments.
You can only negotiate and make adjustments when the facts are on the table. Avoid at all costs: Even if you're on a survival-only budget right now, it may help you both to think about your long-term plans and the potential risks you might encounter.
Negotiate Before having a conversation with your partner, you need to think about what you consider to be the best solution. Bear in mind that this needs to be one that leaves room for negotiation. Life has a way of creating money problems and issues Change is just part of life. And a shift in your circumstances can have a huge impact on your financial stability.
Quiz: Is money causing problems in your relationship? | Relate
Here are some examples of the kinds of changes you may well face during the lifetime of your relationship or marriage. Any of these will have an impact on your household budget Other changes might happen suddenly and totally unexpectedly.
You will get through the crisis together, providing you communicate effectively. What to do if your partner remains uncooperative Perhaps you've followed my steps to get your partner or spouse on board in dealing with the money problems.
Quiz: Is money causing problems in your relationship?
But he or she still doesn't want to cooperate? In that case, here's what you can do next I also highly recommend you talk to a professional counsellor. I suspect that there are other aspects of your relationship that aren't working either. A little support and advice from a trained therapist can help you to start mending anything that needs a touch of TLC.
If that can't or doesn't help, you may need to consider Step 2.
However, if your partner's attitude to money means you're tumbling into debt, you have to take control. And if you have children, their sense of security most definitely needs to be taken into account too. For more help with this, take a look at these websites: If you communicate honestly and respectfully, and if your relationship is healthyyou have every chance of reaching agreements about money.
Please, rate this article I really hope this article is of help to you. Thank you so much in anticipation. Do you need help? Talk to an online counsellor Your problem is never too small or too big, too silly or too complicated to ask for help from an understanding and supportive licensed therapist.
Relationships & money - How to deal with financial problems | Australian Natural Health Magazine
It's easy to get started Get angry, start a row and accuse them of being selfish c. When our account goes overdrawn or we miss a loan or credit card payment I immediately Blame my partner for being hopeless with money b. Expect my partner to blame me, because that's what always happens c. Feel anxious because we don't seem to have our spending under control d.
Understand that my partner and I are both responsible, and that we need to sit down and agree a workable financial plan Q4. When planning for holidays I tend to Book the most expensive package I can find, after all we all deserve a decent break b. Get annoyed if my partner wants to spend more or less than me on a family break c.
Feel upset that we all deserve a decent holiday, but understand that we can't do that yet d. Agree to compromise by choosing a holiday where everyone gets something positive out of it without blowing the budget Q5.
If there's spare money left at the end of a month I immediately want to Go out on my own and splash out on something expensive b.
Buy the kids the latest gadget, even though my partner doesn't agree - I can't bear to see them go without c. Try to put a bit aside, but end up spending it on a family treat d.
Decide together with my partner how best to use the spare cash Q6. We usually fall out over money because We discover that we've both kept money secrets from each other b.